steve_boller

No one has everyone's best interests in mind

Thu, 18 Jan 2007 03:13:12 GMT

I don't know what to think about government and politics. I am so uninformed and I do not know how to become "in the know" with all of the complex issues. All I know is I don't think the government is doing a very good job.

In Indiana, Governor Mitch Daniels is focused on making a quick buck for the state so his term in office looks positive and does not care who he rolls over to accomplish this task. What's wrong with making money for the state you may ask. "My Man Mitch's" plan includes getting a private company to pay a bunch of money to put together a massive toll road linking six of the more rural Indiana counties surrounding Indianapolis together.

Wow, what a great idea! ..If we didn't already have ample interstate access and roads in perfectly acceptable condition. The plan would potentially divide my home county, leaving locals no choice but to pay a toll to get to areas that used to be easily accessible.

The toll is only the beginning of our problems. The proposed route plows directly through beautiful farmland, included the farm where my mother grew up and my grandmother still lives. Imminent domain laws state that those who lose land or lose property value because of the project would be compensated 125%, but the law has a clause that leaves the Indiana Department of Transporation Exempt! So many people who have lived in Hancock County for years could get screwed.

Basically, I am frustrated because I am powerless to fight the system. I feel like this all the time. I see systems in place in my school and local government and think I could do a better job. The problem is that I am 17. What good is a 17 year old? It is pretty discouraging and would be easy to just slide into mediocrity like my peers.

..If that was me. I want to be better than average and I want to do something special. I just don't know what yet. I have accomplished what some would call a great deal during my teenage years, but I have trouble acknowledging and taking pride in my accomplishments; I am my biggest critic. No matter what I do, it's not enough for me.

With this attitude, imagine how hard it is for me to maintain an inner confidence in music, where I often find myself feeling like I should just throw in the towel because after all there are so many people with musical talent and I am just a number!

So, what can I do? What can any of us do? John Mayer may be "Waiting on the World to Change", but I have my own view. This is an excerpt from one of my newer songs many of you have not heard.

"And maybe I'm crazy/But I need something else/And if the world won't change/I'll do it myself"

Wish me luck!

Air Hockey and Magic Tricks

Mon, 30 Oct 2006 23:32:11 GMT

So, it has been too long. It isn't like me to not log onto my myspace and respond to stuff every day...some of you may have wondered why?
(awkward silence)
Ok, maybe not...but I was gone for almost a week. My family and Iwent on our annual trip with another family to Gatlinburg, Tennessee in the Smoky's. It was great fun! One of my last chances to kick back with no cares and enjoy what's left of this childhood of mine. We had a really great time. I am pleased to inform you that I won the cabin air hockey tournament and was a semi-finalist in pool! Yes, victory is sweet.
I also learned my first ever magic trick. ..At least since I was 8, but this one is really cool!
Music-wise, the trip into the mountains did not help me write any great new song, but I did spend some time with a friend re-working some of my old songs. He sang harmony and it sounded great! I do have quite a catalog of new material. No new album is in the works yet, but I am looking at options for how to go about recording and releasing such a project.
Oh yeah..college. I am accepted into Indiana University in Bloomington and have sent my application in to Xavier University in Cincinatti, Ohio. I will hear from them in January. I will either be majoring in English or double majoring in Music and English.
Last but not least, don't forget about my amazing e-team. A great guy from Nebraska named Drew is in charge and trying to get people promoting. If you want to join in the fun, just send a message to www.myspace.com/sbpromotions and he'll get you all set up.
Thanks for all your support! I'll keep you up on the news.

-sb

iEstoy muy cansado!

Sat, 19 Aug 2006 03:16:44 GMT

School really sucks...not so much because of the work and stuff but just how tired it makes me...It's 11:11 (woo make a wish) pm on friday night and I am about to collapse. 177 more days.

I'm mainly writing because I am slightly distressed; why does ANYONE blog? Ha..and a great way to relieve some of this is share it with you!

First off, this has to do with a girl. To understand the context and back-story, refer to songs 5-10 on my CD and the "Song Stories" blog explaining them. You see, for the last few weeks I have gradually distanced myself more, talking and seeing eachother less in an effort to move on. Well, now it has come to my attention that she has become quite good friends with one of my close friends. It turns out that they text message a lot now and probably talk more than I talk to her..and it is just really weird. Yeah, I want to move on and move away from her, but this is just hard to deal with. I know they are just friends, but it still is strange having her talking to one of my friends that she met THROUGH ME more than me nowadays. Whatev.

Sleep time. Venting: Complete.

Oh, I wrote an orgasmic new song on the piano tonight...just throwing it out there

Shake and bake

a lesson in loneliness

Wed, 12 Jul 2006 04:10:54 GMT

What is it with the lonely days that just put all of my feelings and sadness that stays under the surface and throws them under a magnifying glass? It's almost funny to think of all the things I have going for me, how GOOD I have it compared to many people in this world, and yet I still manage to feel down.

I guess I have a social interaction quota ingrained in my subconscious, a quota that spirals my thoughts out of control when left un-reached. The last few days have left me really missing friends, especially one person in particular. I just don't know what my deal is.

Then of course, there is always "The situation"..yeah, the one thing in my life that I wish I could change but just can't. The dynamic I want to break. The chance I want to take but cannot seem to convince myself there is any hope...yeah. Vague, eh?

I guess I just pray to God that he will help me concentrate on my blessings and all of the things going well for me in my life. You know, something that is going "bad" in my small, limited perspective really is probably exactly the way God intends it; my impatient mind and imperfect view of things just skews everything. I pray for better understanding and the ability to let go of painful, meaningless thoughts and just live.

I have a big gig coming up as a part of Midwest Music Summit 2006. I am really excited and hopeful for the opportunities this may lead to. Many record executives attend MMS and it is likely someone important might be watching...

The show is free and open to the public as well! I really hope to see anyone there that can make it.

See? Venting is good for everyone, even for us musicians to people we have never met :).

Take care...enjoy the warm months, and don't let the small stuff get you down.

-Steve

an update

Sat, 27 May 2006 17:31:50 GMT

I'd love to be able to tell you that I am amidst the western leg of my US tour and just wanted to check in, but that would be a lie. I am sitting indian style in an easy chair in my living room. School is out for the summer and I now have plenty of time to devote to my music, whether that be writing, recording, online promoting, shows, and hopefully touring.

A lot of you have asked me to come to (insert your far-off town here). As much as I want to, my mother has decided to be very protective and scared for me as far as leaving the state alone or with a friend goes and I don't know if a tour this summer is going to happen. Right now I'm trying to find some local shows and I know of at least a couple I'll be playing at for sure, so if you live in Indy just keep checking back to this site. For those of you in the midwest relatively close to Indiana, I might be able to make it out; email me at steve@steveboller.com only if you are serious about getting me to your town; I need someone willing to orchestrate things locally and help me organize everything; I have no booking agent.

switching gears....

So last night was high school graduation for the class of 2006. I felt there was some hidden meaning in the ceremony itself; four years of trying to make everyone like you and be as popular as possible, worrying about a reputation and crushing others along the way, all ended by your name being called, followed by a few scattered claps. I laughed on the inside as various members of the varsity football team heard their names called, in turn ending the peak of their lives. For those of you who haven't found a niche in high school and feel alone, don't sweat it. This is four of a potentially eighty or ninety year life. People are so misguided; the values of almost all of my peers don't go much beyond getting drunk and having sex as much as possible..isn't there more to life? Maybe? I have enjoyed high school and found some good friends and had some good times, but I don't put much stock in it. I have one year left to enjoy with these people before I never see almost all of them again. Why waste this time worrying what people think?

So anyway, I hope you enjoyed the update and also found some meaning in my thoughts. Right now I am waiting for Itunes and some other online digital music stores to get my CD up and selling. Your guess is as good as mine as to when that will happen, but hopefully soon because I am pretty poor right now. As always, you can order the CD by heading to my store..and, as always, I appreciate it more than you know.

-Steve

It's a beautiful day..

Sun, 23 Apr 2006 22:17:27 GMT

So, I'm just sitting here..enjoying some peace and solitude in one of those rare moments when I have very little to do. I've just spent some time getting things set up as far as CD orders (when am I not doing something connected with that?) and getting things working with CDBaby. Things are looking good and I hope that this will increase sales; prom was last night and I spent over half of what I've made so far..But it was very fun! I will be putting some pictures on here once I get them.

There is so much going on right now as far as music. A local paper is coming to my house sometime this week to interview me and take pictures, and I'm also featured in two other local papers soon. Also, my music will be available on Itunes/Naspter/every other existing online music store in a month or two. Very cool! I'm also working on plans for a summer tour right now. I'm up for travelling anywhere as long as someone there is willing to coordinate and pay for my travel expenses...I'm really hoping I'll find some takers!

As far as personal life; I'm feeling pretty happy with my friendships right now. After a bit of turmoil with some people I've kind of drifted away from because of my music, things have kind of levelled off and I've found some other, really great friends in the process. Life is ever-changing..I think I've learned a lot about myself and the world around me this year..this age 16 that has taught me so much.

Speaking of that, my birthday is Friday! I'm going to have to go through and change all those 16's to 17's on Myspace and everywhere else..

So that's a short update on my life and what's going on as far as music. I'll keep you posted!

-Steve